Human beings, at the most fundamental level, are controlled by primitive instincts – such as the fight-or-flight reaction -, which are in opposition to our gift of consciousness and sense of self. In any risky or difficult circumstance, the majority of people decide to defend themselves or run away. If wild animals in the jungles or forests confront you, it is a useful and vital instinct to react to. However, when you are facing an emotional crisis with your spouse or another family member, this is not always the most effective approach to take. When faced with such a situation, it is essential to keep in mind that you have two options: You can fight, literally, or even go through a divorce, or run away (by not addressing the issues or refusing to address the issues) or you could mediate.
Mediation Isn’t An Automatic Response And Therefore Is Usually A Difficult Choice To Make For People Involved Who Are In Conflict
We tend to think in terms of retribution or trying to avoid our issues, however, the more rational approach of discussing the issues with a qualified mediator and pursuing the best possible solution for your problems is about overcoming your instincts and moving into an elevated level of thinking. Since our natural reactions are the more honest, normal reactions and are based on our own experiences, this is not easy. However, these instincts are usually more destructive than beneficial since we live in the city, not in the wild.
However, just consenting to mediation is not enough. Many people see family mediationto create a new battlefield for the battle, and it often occurs when they are in the middle of their fight-or-flight reaction.Mediation helps resolve disputes by using simple and less complicated methods.This means that the parties quit their squabbles, focus exclusively on a mutually beneficial solution, and refrain from voicing grievances and threatening each other.
While In The Process, Individuals Can Frequently Be Caught In A Flurry Of Emotions
They can then switch their fight or flight instincts towards the mediator. They can transfer the anger or frustration to the neutral third party, which, in turn, causes failure of the mediation process. One of the most important aspects of effective mediation is knowing our own instincts and how they can influence our lives. The initial reaction to our instincts is something that we can’t escape. If this happens we must allow them to run their course, then take the time to breathe deeply and follow the more civilized path of actions.
Another Idea That Is Prevalent In Family Mediation Is That One Side Wishes To Have The Session Run In A Different Manner Than The Other
A good mediator will bring this issue back to the parties so that everyone can agree on the most effective way to proceed. For instance, a deeper mediation may be held in the future, but immediate issues must be addressed in the initial meeting. This method should be used for any recent family issue, such as divorce. Before signing agreements that are final the parties could decide to have a moment to think through the entire agreement.
The duration between sessions should be considered well. Some mediators let clients determine the amount of time that should be permitted between sessions, mediators suggest that parties meet regularly until the final resolution has been resolved. Every issue, including those that take a lot of time, like divorces, is able to be dealt with efficiently and in a timely time by sticking to the setup. Mediators can assist in resolving any legal issue, however, it is a skilled and experienced professional to help clients walk the fine line between not rushing and ensuring that the amount of time spent working on the issue is effective.
